Don’t get us wrong, there is a time and place for quickies – and, yep, they can be hot. However, most of the time, you should strive to make sex last longer and, and enjoy it with no time limit.
To be fair, the average duration of penetrative sex lasts 3 to 6 minutes. So, if you are in that range, you have a normal capacity for sex. But, if both of you (or just you) aren’t walking away happy, you have a problem. Luckily, the problem can easily be addressed.
How to make the pleasure in bed last longer? Here is what you can do to last longer in bed, or help your partner last longer, so you can both reach the finish line.
Focus on the breathing
Quick orgasm has a lot to do with how you and your partner breathe. Accelerated breathing is one of the signals for approaching sexual pleasure. If you take control of the frequency of inhalation and exhalation, and you can breathe slower and deeper at the right time, then you will certainly make sex last longer.
Use your tongue
The trick to making sex last longer is to use the tongue. No, this is not about oral sex. Are you ready to fulfill your sexual pleasures? Turn your tongue over your upper palate behind your teeth. This will slow down the pleasant outcome for a while, and you will be able to enjoy the sex even longer.
Another safe way to make sex last longer for women is to exercise the pelvic floor muscles with Kegel exercises. Classic version: quickly tighten and release the muscles of the vagina for 10 seconds, then rest for 10 seconds. Do this exercise in 3 sets, several times a day. These exercises are not only useful for making sex last longer but also help women prepare for childbirth. They also regenerate tissues after childbirth and prevent many inflammatory diseases in the genital area.
Change the position
Properly chosen sexual position can also make sex last longer. In the missionary position, the man should slow down the rhythm of movement, breathe deeply, and tighten the abdominal muscles. In the cowgirl position, the woman can easily make sexual intercourse last longer, especially if the man is not lying down, but half-sitting.
Do not forget the foreplay
The best way to make sex longer is to have extended foreplay. Many partners during sex are too obsessed with their excitability and want to reach orgasm as quickly as possible. At this point (this is especially true for men) they are nervous and upset because everything is going too slowly and they do just want to reach orgasm.
The importance of foreplay for an amazing orgasm
But you need to understand that making love is not a “marathon”, but a moment of relaxation and pleasure. Organize romantic foreplay, flirt with your partner, tease them, make the foreplay a tempting game, where everyone enjoys the game and does not strive for the “finish line”.
The benefits of Kegel exercises for men and women
Kegel exercises have become very popular, especially among women, but many women still don’t know what a Kegel is exactly.
Also, many people are unaware of the many benefits that Kegel exercises can have on overall wellness and health.
If there was some exercise that took only thirty seconds, did not require a doctor’s permission, did not require equipment, had physical and even sexual benefits — would you try it?
Okay, we think it’s time to learn about Kegel exercises.
What are Kegel exercises?
Kegel exercises are done to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles. The pelvic floor muscles are the muscles you use to stop the flow of your urine when you are sitting on the toilet. These exercises not only can stop your urine, but they can also prevent the accidental passing of gas or poop, and can even help to improve your orgasms. If you keep these muscles fit, you will keep your bowel, uterus, and bladder from sagging down into the vagina.
Benefits of Kegel exercises for women
These exercises can help overall fitness. Prolonged sitting, injury, repetitive movements, and pregnancy wreak havoc on your body. In many women, prolonged sitting can lead to deconditioning in both strength and aerobic fitness.
The stretching of the abdominal muscles during pregnancy can weaken the core. Also, weight gain is common due to pregnancy or our busy lives. Regular exercise can alleviate some of the effects and help women get back into shape faster. But, adding Kegel exercises to your workout routine is essential. A toned pelvic floor reduces the risk of incontinence, pelvic organ prolapse, and painful sex.
When it comes to sex, these exercises improve blood circulation to the vagina and pelvic floor, so they can are helpful for lubrication and arousal. After childbirth, many women feel like their vagina isn’t as tight as it was before. But, strengthening the pelvic floor muscles with these exercises can make it a little bit firmer. Women can easily contract their muscles, and that can improve sensation. Even if it is just psychological, it can help them feel better about their pelvic floor, so that is a positive benefit as well.
These muscles are the most important when it comes to orgasm, so these exercises can help improve the intensity of the orgasm. The pelvic floor muscles are responsible for the pleasurable contractions felt in your genitals when the orgasm happens. If you have healthy pelvic floor muscles, you will experience more intense orgasms that last longer. If you have difficulty achieving the big O, you may be experiencing weak pelvic floor muscles.
Also, strong pelvic floor muscles will allow you to grip your partner more tightly during penetration, making the sex more pleasurable for him as well! Strong muscles also offer comfortable vaginal penetration.
Benefits of Kegel exercises for men
The good news is that these exercises are beneficial to men, too. They help them with stress, overactive bladder symptoms, fecal incontinence symptoms, or gas. Also, men who have undergone prostate surgery can benefit from Kegel exercises.
Sings that your partner is selfish in bed
Sex with your partner should provide pleasure, enjoyment, passion, and connection, but that’s nearly impossible if your partner is selfish in bed.
To experience all the beautiful things sex offers, you both shouldn’t be selfish in bed – you need to be equally involved.
Although orgasm is not and does not always have to be the goal when we have sex, when it is present, it should be the culmination reached by both of you. Today, women talk about sex more openly than ever, and many of them admit that they are still deprived of the big O. Women who have selfish partners, see orgasm as something unattainable and something that does not come naturally to them.
Orgasm is achievable when both of you strive for it. But if you are one of those women who don’t achieve orgasms very often, you may simply have a selfish partner who is not ready to satisfy your needs. Below you will find five things that point to this.
You do all the work
If your partner is constantly passive and constantly expects you do all the work, it is a sign that he is selfish during sex. Activity during foreplay, oral pleasure, and effort during sex should be equal. No partner should expect the other to do everything and enjoy the pleasure without giving anything in return.
He avoids foreplay
For many women, foreplay is a very important part of sexual intercourse, and many cannot have an orgasm without it. If your partner avoids that part and immediately goes to sex, it is a sign that he is selfish and he wants to satisfy only his needs.
The importance of foreplay for an amazing orgasm
He doesn’t fulfill your wishes
You should not keep to yourself any desires, fantasies, and things you want in sex. But if you tell your partner about them and he refuses to even try to fulfill those fantasies, you should know that your partner is selfish in bed. Okay, we know that no one should ever do things that make them feel bad during sex, but if your partner refuses things like foreplay, changing poses, or getting involved in sex, you need to talk more about all of this to see if there are other issues or if he is selfish.
Your partner is focused only on his needs
Sex should always be an activity enjoyed by both of you. If your partner asks you to do something that only he wants or if he gets angry when you refuse to do something that makes you feel bad, it is a sign that he is selfish. Also, your partner should not be focused only on his orgasm during sex, but also on your desires.
Your partner believes that he has the right to have sex whenever he wants
Selfishness in sex is often manifested in the demand for sex and rejection. A person who thinks he has the right to have sex at any time and who can say “no” to you, but does not accept “no” from you, is not only selfish but also dangerous.
Mistakes men make in bed
Sex is amazing, of course. But sometimes, either when men try something new or when they are caught up in the moment, the sex can be no so good.
Men, it is really important to be good in bed, because if you do not have the moves and skills to satisfy women, they will be quick to let you go.
Here are the sex mistakes men make in bed way too often. These things they do during sex can end up killing the mood. Dudes, make sure you aren’t doing any of them.
They move too quickly to genital touch
When they finally understand how long it takes to arouse a lady, they want to start the process immediately. They like their genitals stimulated directly, so they assume women would want the same. However, they should allow the woman to prepare psychologically because the early stimulation is not exciting for women. Instead, you should spend some time massaging and kissing her whole body.
Stimulating her vagina instead of her clitoris
For the last time – what you feel on your penis is not what women feel in their vaginas. Feeling in the penis is based on touch, but in the vagina, the sensation is created by pressure and stretch. For women, the clitoris parallels penile sensation (except her anatomy is more sensitive and delicate). The clitoris is the center of women’s sexual universe. However, it gets harder. Finding the clit is only half of the job. Some of you need to work on their techniques once they are down there. To start, don’t treat the clitoris like you are scrubbing a pan clean.
They have high expectations due to watching porn
Not everything you see on porn can be done in your bedroom. Maybe your partner is not into everything you have seen online and is not physically capable of doing all that stuff, or maybe they just do not want to. Always listen to your woman’s needs – that’s crucial. Porn also skips foreplay-and-lube events, which are important. We know by now that sipping these steps can be painful.
They do not respond to women’s needs
When a woman tells you to keep going, and she likes it, don’t start to speed up or change your tempo. She liked it the way it was before. If she moans, that does not mean to change into rabbit fuck mode. By rubbing in between the vagina and clitoris up and down (rubbing against the urethra), you can give your partner cystitis, and it does not feel good.
These things are not just about pace, but about knowing whether or not you are cognizant of each other’s verbal and non-verbal cues. Telling your needs and responding to your partner’s needs is the key to amazing sex.
They don’t make sure their partners had an orgasm
Just because you were satisfied, you cannot assume she was too. Unless you made an effort to make it pleasurable enough for her, it may not have happened. Some women need extra help from you to reach the big-O.